Ethan hesitated at the door. What the hell am I doing in Malibu on New Year’s Eve? At the home of a remote team leader whom I barely know? Jake invited me only because Sarah dumped me right before Christmas . . ..
The door opened and a doe-eyed brunette in a nano-chrome body suit threw her arms around him. Ethan had no idea who she was.
“Happy almost 2046, Ethan!” She led him inside and handed him a drink. “I’m Izzy. I made your favorite Manhattan. Jake’s at the bar. I’ll introduce you to people on the way.”
“How’d you know who I was?
“Security screens.
And my favorite cocktail?”
“Jake told me.”
“And how do you know Jake?”
“I’m his second wife. He spends every New Year’s with his seven exes – wives and girlfriends – as well as other friends.”
New Year’s with his exes? I always heard Jake’s a player, but that’s weird. Ethan surveyed the room. Jake must earn way more than the peons on his teams. Glitzy house. Gorgeous exes. But what’s up with all the geeky guys like me?
A leggy blonde in a sequined mini dress sidled up to him with a tray of sushi. “Take one, Ethan. Real salmon. Nothing fake for Jake.”
She knows my name, too. Creepy.
Izzy interjected. “This is Jessica. Jake’s soulmate in the twenty-twenties.”
“Nice to meet you. Does Jake pay you exes to bartend and serve at his parties?”
The two women exchanged glances and Izzy answered. “We’re all still crazy about Jake.”
Are they his exes or paid escorts? And why just male guests? Ethan decided to ask Jake directly.
“Thanks for the invite, Jake. I have to ask, though. Are these gorgeous women really your exes?”
“Sort of. They’re humanoid facsimiles of my exes.”
“Lifelike robots? How’d you do that?”
“I didn’t. My friend Peter did.” Jake pointed to a man next to the bar surrounded by several male guests. “He owns a company that makes robotic doppelgangers of the living and the dead. Uses DNA to create the exteriors. AI to capture voices and gestures.”
“Hmm. So, you’ve given up on women?”
“Yep. Too contentious. Peter offered to make me a fully-equipped version of my favorite ex. I gave him Izzy’s old hairbrush and– presto – a non-contentious Izzy. I loved her so much that I ordered replicas of all my exes. They exist only to make me happy.”
“So, they’re all sexbots?”
Jake flashed a sly smile. “Bingo!”
“And this party’s just a sales pitch?”
“I thought you might be in the market. Sorry if I misjudged . . ..”
“No worries. I prefer contentious women, though, so this party’s not for me. But thanks anyway, Jake.”
Halfway home in his driverless transport, Ethan accepted a live call from Sarah.
“Happy 2046, Ethan. My party was boring. Yours?”
“Beyond bizarre.”
“Dinner tomorrow?”
“Sure. Did I ever tell you you’re refreshingly human? Also, I need to return the hairbrush you left behind.”
INSTANT NOODLES 